Thursday, August 23, 2012

BREAKING: LUBBOCK COUNTY V. OBAMA'S UN IN EPIC CIVIL WAR CAGE MATCH

Two if by Helicopter - Lubbock v. Obama's UN in all out civil war cage match

According to a CNN report, Lubbock County Judge Tom Head recently proclaimed that if Obama gets elected, Civil War will break out.


Sure, he could be exaggerating to get a reaction from the so called "liberal media", but the batshit crazy doesn't stop there:
Obama, Head said, will "try to give the sovereignty of the United States away to the United Nations. What do you think the public's going to do when that happens? We are talking civil unrest, civil disobedience, possibly, possibly civil war ... I'm not talking just talking riots here and there. I'm talking Lexington, Concord, take up arms, get rid of the dictator. OK, what do you think he is going to do when that happens? He is going to call in the U.N. troops, personnel carriers, tanks and whatever."

Wait, wait, wait... Let me get this straight... If Obama gets re-elected in a free and fair election by, of and for the people, we're going to have to go toe-to-toe with a bunch of new-age redcoats sporting fancy blue helmets? Whatever will we do? Apparently he's got that covered too...
Head vowed to personally stand "in front of their personnel carriers and say, 'You're not coming in here.' And I've asked the sheriff. I said, 'Are you going to back me on this?' And he said, 'Yeah, I'm going to back you.' Well, I don't want a bunch of rookies back there who have no training and little equipment. I want seasoned veteran people who are trained that have got equipment. And even then, you know we may have two or three hundred deputies facing maybe a thousand U.N. troops. We may have to call out the militia."

So, he's recruiting an Army of well-trained, patriotic deputies to stem the "white tide," you say? Where do I sign!?

Obviously, this elected judicial official - and the COUNTY'S EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT COORDINATOR - knows what's-what up in this piece. So we're inclined to take his comments about the coming United Nations invasion incredibly seriously. But what if Civil War did break out? What would it look like?

As seen in Detroit. (Just kidding! Mostly.)


One could look to great fiction, like the comic series DMZ, in which a domestic uprising leads to national civil war, leaving Manhattan a devastated no man's land trapped between factions vying to the be the most patriotic. (A seriously good read... -ed.)

This doesn't do it justice.


But I tend to subscribe more to the 300 Spartans school of thought. In which, legend has it, 300 Spartan warriors turned back a much larger invading Persian army at the Battle of Thermopylae. Less because of the dramatic historic parallel of a small force of determined fighters standing up to a far more powerful foreign enemy, and more so because of this:

Your argument is compelling.


But then again... Maybe the Honorable Tom Head is right...

This could TOTALLY happen.


Either way, duck and cover, people. It's about to get interesting.



Image Reference: 1) US Department of Defense 2) hoyasmeg via flickr.com, used under Creative Commons Attribution License.

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